The Importance of Listening

It struck me in our last ADDIE to Improv class, when we got to talking about the importance of listening, how difficult it can be to really listen.  Be it our spouse, our customer, our team members.  This cartoon came to mind.  I used to have it pinned up in my cubicle many years ago - and it speaks to the truth of not listening. 

We all want to be useful and helpful.  We all want to use our skills, especially when our economic situation has been so trying.

But how many of us are comfortable with really listening?  To set aside the impulses to jump to a solution before really hearing what is being said and then staying present in a dialogue about what the problem really is.  Does our culture make this easier or harder?  And why?

For me I think the reason I tend to jump to a solution before the person is finished talking is mainly fear.  Fear of not looking smart.  Fear of not having all the answers.  Fear of not being in control.  Ooh, I know.  Big stuff.  I also know that I cannot demand that my fears just go away - but I can recognize them.  Allow them to be there, but still move forward, still listen, remain present, ask questions that further open the conversation, follow the dialogue. 

Because in the end, we come to a better place.  We have authentically built our relationship with another person and ourselves.  We can share our thoughts and ideas and hopefully have a better solution, one that actually addresses the current issues rather than an egocentric solution that is built on what we already know how to do.